Lemonade for your relationship – Work vs. Love | Sharon
Today is Monday, everyone’s least favourite day if you have the typical Mon-Fri routine at work. It’s the end of a weekend and the start of another less-than-exciting work week. Today is my last Monday at my current job so for me, this is the best Monday ever.
For some context, I have been working at my role for almost 1.5 years fresh out of university. Working here has been a challenge to say the least but it’s the challenges in life that teach you the best lessons. While I won’t go into details about the ridiculous (and often immoral, inconsiderate, and just plain insane) experiences I have been through at my job, I will say that I have learned a lot about dealing with people and that some people you see on TV actually exist in real life (think Super Sweet Sixteen spoiled brats + Glenn Close in Devil Wears Prada + All 3 bosses in Horrible Bosses combined into one human being. Times three people). More importantly, I have also learned how work life truly spills over into your love life, and how much of an effect it can have on you and your relationship.
Looking back on the past year and a bit, I’m actually very proud of how Steve and I have coped with balancing work life and our relationship. We work full time, commute to work every day, and also don’t live together, so finding time to hang out and catch up can be a challenge. Here is what has helped us:
Making your significant other #1. Steve has his share of rough days at work and late nights and I have my share of stressful days and packed schedules, but we always make it a priority to catch up with each other every day or if we are super busy, we still check in on each other (via text or email) to remind the other we are thinking of them and they can make it through their tough day.
Any free time is an opportunity to connect. We try to find opportunities where we can squeeze in time together, whether it be skyping or trying to take the train home together or grabbing a quick dinner or snack after work. Weekends are when we spend the most time together, and we try to make the most of all the time we have. Time spent with each other is always an opportunity to learn something new about each other, no matter what you are doing. We can veg out on the couch and watch TV all day and eat junk food…and it’s the best.
Listen. It’s so important to listen to each other talk about their day. It helps you recognize and understand the things that stress your partner out, and having someone there to listen to a rant is sometimes all we need. It also shows that you care and want to invest time learning about and supporting each other.
There’s more to life than work. Probably the most important lesson I’ve learned. We work every day and likely see our coworkers for longer than we see our each other, and it can start to feel like work is your life and relationships and everything else are additional things on the side. Yes we work to make a living and pay our bills and go out to enjoy a nice dinner or movie or shopping trip…but at the end of the day, there is more to life than work. There is love and relationships and being a good person, and these are the things that matter most. You may lose your job but you can get another one. You lose love in your life or that special person or your integrity and it’s a lot harder to get those back. Remember to take the stresses at work in stride and know that work is not the be all and end all. Work gets you through your bills, but love gets you through everything else in life.
It’s important to remember the bigger picture and it’s not about choosing work or love over the other. It’s about working with what you have (whether it be long hours and back-to-back meetings, business trips, late night conference calls, competing deadlines etc.) , and putting in the effort to make that for you and your relationship. When life gives you lemons, make some lemonade that you and your partner can enjoy.
Happy Monday everyone,